V Vernacular

06/21/2007 (7:05 am)

I Can’t Believe I Watched the Whole Thing

Filed under: Frenchy,Joey Devine,McBride

Actually, I didn’t. I skipped the 9th, because watching that game had felt like a chore since the 1st. So of course I managed to miss the only things worth seeing: Devy pitching and Frenchy throwing Varitek out at third. Dammit. At least the Get The Hell Out of Our City Series is over. God knows what will happen against the Tigers, but after that we’ll see the Nationals . . who took a four game series from us last time we played them. Dammit.

The stuff about McBride leaving actually made me sad on the pre-game show, mostly because they featured Depressed Frenchy opining for friendships lost. Hmm. In exchange for our buddy McBaseOnBalls, we got another lefty reliever, a fellow by the name of Wilfredo. So I’ll be calling him Fredo, and hopefully I won’t have to bust out any stupid Godfather jokes, because, you know, they’ll only work if he’s bad.

Frenchy made me mad when he said he was looking forward to the off day. Normally I wouldn’t care, but lately he looks like he just wants to get his at-bats over with, and if he thinks an off day will solve his problems . . . well, I doubt it. Meanwhile, the shots of Andruw furiously shaving away his bat handle were disturbing. I’m sure it was a toothpick by the 9th, but then, I turned the game off in the 8th, so I wouldn’t know.

06/20/2007 (2:45 pm)

The Gang’s All Here!

Filed under: Joey Devine,McBride

Welcome back, Devy! According to Chop-n-Change, we just sent McBride packing and Dev’s up from the minors. I can’t say I’ll miss McBride all that much — his uncanny ability to forget how to pitch after getting two outs (or two strikes, if he was only called in to get one batter) was driving me crazy. I also can’t help feeling a little sorry for him when I try to imagine him pulling that crap with Leyland’s club, but good luck to him.

I can’t wait to hear what we got in return . . . and of course, I can’t wait for Devy’s major league antics to resume. Hopefully he’ll actually get to pitch this time.

04/05/2007 (5:56 pm)

You Said It, Pal

Hey, you know what, Jimmy Rollins was right. The Phillies are the team to best in the National League East. The Braves enjoyed besting them so much, they did it three times in a row! Let’s hope many more teams get to best the Phillies as the season goes on. It was quite fun, what with the hateful fans turning on everybody (even Ryan Howard got booed! Ryan Howard! Twice! Do you think Braves fans would have booed Heap if he got off to a slow start at home? I kind of doubt it!), and in general just being as miserable as possible. Couldn’t have happened to a nicer bunch of people!

Admittedly, the end of that game was embarrassing, but then Soriano came in there and took care of business, so all is well. I can’t figure McBride out. I thought he had confidence problems in high-pressure situations, but getting Howard out last night in a tense moment was no problem, and with a six run lead he fell apart. Maybe he was affected by the cold? That was probably the case with Paronto, who didn’t have much time to get re-warmed up. But I just don’t know what to say about McBride. He definitely gets frazzled out there, but the moments that stress him out don’t make any sense (last year he often cruised through the first two outs, and would then be completely unable to get the third).

My notes from today:

–Could there have possibly been any more trash on the field? Oh wait, MYERS COULD HAVE BEEN PITCHING! Haaaaa.

–At one point, I swear, Skip joined in on the Burrell booing.

–I had to switch to the television audio when Chip and Joe did a little segment on Heap’s dugout hair. They even zoomed in on it and drew lines on it to represent “gel.” It was excellent.

–Batman Jones’ slide at home was pretty excellent as well: in true Andruw style, he basically laid down, and wouldn’t get up until Thor came over to give him a hand.

–I guess they only let people who liked Frenchy into the right field stands today: some guy shook his hand when he went over to chase a foul into the seats. Quite a change from yesterday.

Please tell me you guys heard the story about Heap and the cookies? There is a little kid in Philly who is obsessed with Heap (who isn’t, right? Even Dave O’Brien admits he wants to be Heap), and he waits for him when they get off the bus at the park every day. According to Pete, the kid had two boxes full of cookies waiting for Heap yesterday. Heap, in true Heap form, “passed them out to everybody on the bus.” Oh man. The Heap folk legends have begun: yesterday Skip was talking about Heap taking optional batting practice at the park on Tuesday, in a total “while the rest of those bums were sleeping in, Heap was walking to the park, ten miles, uphill, in the snow, and he helped an old lady across the street on the way there!” tone.

I love that Heap is getting shamelessly marketed as perfect this season, because, by all accounts, he is: nicest guy ever, etc. It’s fun, in a “Heap’s tears could cure cancer, too bad he’s never cried” sort of way. It’ll be interesting to see how they treat Frenchy, in the meantime. He was supposed to be this marketing dream come true, originally. At the moment, they’re still a charming little matching set, but Frenchy needs to match Heap on the ballfield a little bit better if the franchise wants to keep singing that song.