V Vernacular

03/16/2007 (7:31 am)

“Players Will Smell Better”

Filed under: Cormier,Preseason,The Vulch

I was able to watch our game against the Yankees last night, again on their YES! network (is there an exclamation point after Yes? There should be). Cormier looked good, though Joe Girardi, who was calling the game with some obnoxious ass who had the nerve to compare Kelly Johnson to Chuck Knoblauch just because he looked “awkward” on a play he turned successfully, made a good point: the Yankees have never really seen Cormier, so he had that mysterious new pitcher advantage. Still, he looked confident and went after hitters. Idiotically, perhaps, I would love to think that his performance in spring training means something. Isn’t our losing-Hampton-again karma good enough to earn us Cormier becoming a decent fourth starter? Hmm.

The Vulch swooped in and gave up a homer, and we lost 3-2. Before him, Yates gave up a walk but had two strikeouts. Chipper had a home run, Heap and Langerhans had hits. Girardi mentioned that this is the time of year when the spring games really start to drag for both players and fans. At first they’re exciting (to nerds like myself, anyway) just because baseball has been gone for so long, and a week or so before the actual season they’ll get exciting again, because decisions about the opening day roster will be finalized. But these middle of the month games are getting pretty dull, I must admit.

The YES! network tried to spice things up with an ad for “Hilarious YES! Ultimate Road Trip Hijinks,” which I guess is like, A-Rod crying “Are we there yet?” from the back of the team bus, and Jeter threatening to pull over and really give him something to cry about?

You know you’re a Yankee when even your Japanese teammates whine on the field.

Here’s an article about the new ballcaps that reads like an ad, but is pretty funny for its promise of better smelling, less sweaty ballplayers. I’ll believe that about John Thomson when I see an oscillating fan mounted on top of his hat.

02/20/2007 (6:40 pm)

Andruw’s Culinary Adventures

Andruw has arrived at camp, amid lots of questions and speculation about what he’ll do next season. I’m sure it’s on his nerves, and it’s damn well started to get on mine. It’s unlikely that he knows what he’s going to do at this point, and even if he did, he’s not going to talk about it. Not now, not after the All-Star break, probably not until the offseason.

I’m much more interested in talk of his weight loss, personally. Apparently he gained an extra twenty pounds in Japan because the guys ate KFC and McDonald’s every day while they were over there for their All-Star game. Geez, he could have at least tried Kobe steak or some shrimp tempura. But anyway, the story is that he bet his wife he could lose weight faster than her, and she won because he was “partying.” Nicole Jones is my favorite Braves wife by far, and I appreciate her scheme to get Andruw at least relatively back in shape. Smoltz claims Andruw looks like he did in 2005, a career year for him, so hopefully he’ll give us a season to remember him by, just in case he does leave.

Tons of great pictures from Yahoo Sports

02/14/2007 (9:04 am)

Getaway Day

First off, I have to share this thing my friend found in her doctor’s waiting room a few days ago. She said she had a valentine for me, and laid this sucker on me:

This is not a graphic I made, this is an actual thing that I have! Apparently the Braves sent out these valentines to their mailing list. Which raises the question: why didn’t I find one of these glorious things in my mailbox?! Do I not subscribe to the Braves version of Tiger Beat magazine? My name should not only be on their mailing list, it should be like, starred three times. Anyway, good thing my friend passed this along; I will cherish it forever. Here’s hoping Frenchy and Heap have a nice Valentine’s day spent packing their cars for spring training.

Other news:

-What more is there to say about Liberty Media’s acquisition of the Braves this week? Not much, until they release some kind of statement. The budget freeze is over, but I highly doubt that there are days of carefree spending to come, as we were bought to save them millions in taxes.

-I’m extremely amused and also terrified by the points system we invented to save money on the Vulch. Apparently it offers incentives for making starts, which is the terrifying part. Less or more terrifying than Davies as our fifth starter? I’m not sure – pitchers and catchers this weekend could perhaps shed some light there. But anyway, points system: it was not fully explained, but are there points for like, good behavior? Getting the other guys sodas, keeping his locker clean? I hope so.

-Talking Chop mentioned this little tidbit a few days ago:

Manager Bobby Cox will assign one of his five starters to be caught by backup C Brayan Pena, but he hasn’t decided which one yet.

My money is still on Hampton.

Two days out from camp! Here’s the first Deadspin post about spring training, how exciting! One commenter says he worked for the Braves during spring training one year, and that they mostly laze around and play golf. Sounds about right, knowing our golf-obsessed team, but even so! Excitement!