V Vernacular

Author: Jenny

  • Braves Wives: The 2007 Power Rankings

    ATTENTION: All of you people who are finding my site by searching for “brian mccann girlfriend,” “andruw jones wife,” “kelly johnson girlfriend,” and “jeff francoeur when are you getting married,” (as if Google is an extension of Frenchy’s consciousness, if only) etc.? This is the post for you! Behold the information you have sought! As […]

  • Modern Art

    Please enjoy this metaphor, courtesy of some AP genius: This needs to be blown up to wall-size and hung in the MOMA with a big placard that just says STERIODS next to it. Or maybe something even more obscure, like the chemical formula for HGH. This one is pretty good, too, with his henchmen hovering […]

  • Hey, Remember Salty?

    So, um. Jules is getting more playing time than I expected. Like, a lot more. In fact, where the hell is Salty? Anyone seen him lately? Vizquel: Oh sweet God, is that the cold breath of Death I feel on the back of my neck?! Yes, I play for the Giants, but I’m not that […]

  • Finally, The Collection Will Be Complete

    So we’re leaving in a few hours for Heap Giveaway Day at the park. Hopefully it won’t rain on us like it did during Frenchy Giveaway Day last year . . . Here are some highlights from my old blog: Frenchy Night brought out all the #7 jerseys on fangirls and boys of all ages, […]

  • Something Not Cynical!

    So, okay. We got swept by the Reds. Davies, who started this disaster off with a bang, got hung out to dry at the end there, having to come up in the bottom of the fifteenth when we were down by one with two outs. And he’s a pitcher, right, but you know it was […]

  • DRAMA!

    So I woke up this morning feeling like I’d only dreamed a baseball game last night, after all the off days. I came to the computer and read email for a few minutes before I remembered that there would be AP photos and quotes to harvest, brand new! And boy were there. Apparently the second […]

  • Heap in All Star Land: DAY TWO (of Two)

    Just kidding, it was the Barry Bonds Show Starring Barry! Four hours long, 70% commercials! Kicked off with the traditional Random Guy Gets Humiliated segment, sponsored by Taco Bell! Followed by awkward tribute to Willie Mays, sponsored by Cadillac, featuring Mays signing a ball and giving it to Reyes while Bonds stood nearby and looked […]

  • Heap in All Star Land: DAY ONE (of Two)

    So last night’s Home Run Derby was disturbingly Heap-free. Not that I wanted him to participate — as the contestants were walking onto the field all I could think was “thank God I don’t particularly care about any of these guys.” I was nervous for them anyway, even for Holliday. But it seemed like last […]

  • Devy Watch 07

    Days Devy has been on the major league roster in 07: 3 Times I have seen Devy pitch this season: 0 He did actually pitch one inning during his second day trip to the majors, but it was in a blowout loss that I had finally turned off in the 8th inning. Figures! Maybe he’ll […]

  • Frenchy Gets This A Lot

    Kent: Oooooooh pretty . . . Kent: /reaches out, Torgo-style Kent: /freezes Kent: OH MY GOD WHERE’S THE BASEBALL?!?! In other news, we finally won a game.